You’d think that after three weeks of teaching a class that almost no one shows up to (last week’s head count was two), I’d be a little discouraged. It’d be really really easy for me to go into toxic thought world, and obsess over what I’ve been doing wrong – why aren’t people coming to my classes?? But honestly, strangely, I’m still feeling really good about it.
I’m not a naturally positive person. Any looking-on-the-brightside I do is a concentrated effort to not listen to my loud inner pessimist. For an awful long time though, I let that pessimistic voice win. Growing up, anything I wasn’t immediately good at, I quit.
So I’m as surprised as anyone else that I’m still so optimistic and hopeful about this whole teaching thing. I’m actually kind of enjoying the struggle, and proud of my little improvements week to week. Even now compared to the practice classes I taught while earning my certification, I feel so much more confident in leading a class. I’m listening to my own life advice for a change – no one starts out as an expert.
Even as far as the small class size is concerned, I’m not stressin’. Who do I think I am, Rachel Brathen? I’m not gonna start out with 2.1 million Instragram followers, or selling out huge yoga workshops; even Yoga Girl herself started from teaching tiny imperfect yoga classes. Right now, I’m grateful for every single student that turns up to practice with me. It’s a drop-in, open-to-anyone class, so return students make my heart extra happy. You liked me enough to come back??? Oh I love you so much.
Like the rest of yoga, it’s a journey I guess. Maybe someday I’ll get to the level of my yogi idols, maybe (probably) not. For now, I’m enjoying every stumbling step on the way there.
mai pen rai, happy friday to you all ❤